Bloom

So what? If I fell in love with a man, who is also in love with another man?!

I was told it doesn’t make any sense! I was told that I knew it from the very beginning but still why did I pushed through it? They didn’t know that even I had been asking myself the same questions over and over! I had fought so hard to not get into the point where I would fall so hard and end up breaking my own heart, but I did! It felt so bad and so sad that I had to be where I am today just because I followed my heart.

It is not easy to fall in love with a man who is also in love with another man. I had to condition my head all the time and tame my heart not to beat so fast when he’s around. Heaven knows how badly I have fought for every feeling that I had, to resist the emotions, to never overthink the situation. I tried so hard to be rational and logical but it seemed like my heart was even more stubborn than my head. I don’t even know why? Is this even love? Is this even real? My resistance to everything was overlooked as me being rude, as me being so hard. But deep inside I was melting, I am as soft as the air that suffocated me, that made it so hard for me to breathe.

He didn’t know how painful that was. To fight with your own thoughts, to have a debate in your own head with no chances of winning an argument, but still I chose that feeling! The feeling of loving him from a far, The feeling of setting him free, the feeling of supporting him in exploring his identity. The joy in seeing him happy even if it isn’t me that caused it. He didn’t know that I wished him well that I never grasped the idea that we could really be together because I believed that I will never be enough and that he deserves more, loving him from a distance was all it could ever be and that’s all that was left for me. He didn’t know how it all rolled up to this because I was too hard on him and to myself. I made him believe that I am fine, that I am okay but I was screaming, losing my senses. All these didn’t matter because in my heart I have loved him so dearly in ways I knew how.

Until one day that I have to tell him that I love him. It felt incredibly awful! For the first time in this lifetime I am being honest to myself that I like this man and I am willing to risk it all! Surely I had fallen for other guys before but it never came to this point of being brutally true to myself that I feel something special for someone. I may be naive, but this is who I am. I was always in denial of the fact that I may be having feelings for someone, well that’s how it goes. I built this wall so strong that no other man can break, but he was an exception. He didn’t just break my walls, he climbed his way through and made me believe he will stay and the sad thing was, I let him in, I made him stay.

I am a person with severe trust issues and when I say severe, It is really SEVERE! I was always hesistant about him, his intentions, his actions. I always question his motives, maybe he’s just too kind? maybe I am his guilt trip or maybe he’s bored? maybe he’s just too good to be true or maybe because he’s simply my friend. I never felt his genuine friendship all these years, not a single bit! I don’t know why? maybe I am the problem, maybe I have the problem. Yet as this fiasco continued I have proven myself right. Why? because instead of letting me heal, he chose to push through a conversation that ended up so bad. He was fighting for the friendship, he said. I was fighting for me, for my healing I said and that means to not be friends with him anymore!

Was it too much to ask? Is it selfish to save your own sanity? Damn it! I was rejected by a man who is in love with another man who claims himself to be my friend. How can you even recover from that? How can you even tell yourself to stop crying? How can you even find the strength to forgive yourself for feeling too much and how can you seek for that courage to start anew? I lose it all, the love I kept for years, and the friend behind my every tears.

Is it too much to ask for space? for silence? Is it too much to ask to save myself? He even told me that I am self centered! That I always think of what I feel but I never thought of what he feels! I just don’t get it, he told me he doesn’t feel anything special for me! Okay, so maybe it was about the “friendship” thing but if he was really my “friend” as a friend he should have considered that I was hurting, that I am in pain, that I was rejected! He could have just stayed silent and respected me and what I felt but he didn’t. The most painful part is that he didn’t take this whole thing seriously and I felt belittled and disrespected as a human being and as a woman capable of feeling. He had the guts to invalidate whatever I felt because he was a man in love with another man and I was just a “sister” to him. I had no time to be rational and logical. I am not even that smart to weigh things! At that time I was so emotional, was it ever a crime to feel too much all at the same time? I am only human capable of loving and a woman who is still hurting.

I wonder why it came to this point, maybe I loved him because he seemed to care for me, for the things I like, for the ones I love. Maybe I loved him because he was always there, always willing to help. Maybe I loved him because he sees something good in me, maybe he believed in me, in the things that I could do, or the person that I could be. I loved him because he was there when everyone left, he made me feel something that I am worthy to be cared for, something that I have deprived myself of, something I never knew until I met him. I loved him because he never fails to listen maybe that was the best thing about him. I might ran out of reasons why I loved him but what I felt, that is something I can’t explain further, no rules, no standards, no rationale, no judgement, just LOVE.

Is it? I was hungry for love, for care, for someone that will understand and accpet me that now as I go through this phase of moving on I realized that I don’t have to look for all of those things I sought from him or from anybody else but rather just look deep into who I am. Perhaps the lesson that all these has imprinted in me is that, Learn to love yourself, accept who you are, understand what you can’t, work on what you could and please take good care of yourself for at the end of the day it is only you that could save your sanity and your well being.

Never feel sorry for being who you are, we’re all human capable of making mistakes and making things right. Never deprive yourself of the distance, space and the silence you need to heal. You know yourself better you can get through it! Never trust a person who calls you a friend but refuses to respect you, judges you and doesn’t take you seriously. Be cautious on who you open yourself up to, not everyone who comes will truly care for you and stay! Never chase for love and never ever beg for it, the right love will come at the right time. Love knows no rules, no gender, no age. Love knows only the truth and when you’re lucky enough you might find love in a friendly way possible. After all it could have been a life changing lesson learned.

Please be good to yourself and always, love bravely!

I will never regret that day when I realized that I love you and that day when I told you that I really do. but please allow me to live my life without you. Thank you. You might not have loved me back in ways I had hoped for but you gave me a lesson that I will cherish forever.
Have a great life!

“Strive to be happy”

This is me, moving on. Yes, I am that girl who fell in love with a man who is in love with another man. #Friendzone

Love is a risk, either you win or you lose it all.

-FRG

words and photos are all original from feistyredgirl

-all rights reserved-

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I would not entertain another

Last full show

And am exhausted

Ain’t no excitement at all

Nevertheless

Ain’t  no willingness to entertain at all

Last full show

Curtains closed

I have no interest to mingle after the show

Nor to entertain any stranger

For the wholeness of the show

Is over

And am not into re-opening another  

For I have loved the previous more

The upcoming is not exciting

And thy too much pre-occupied           

Sorry

Try another show

Curtains closed

And you’re not welcome 

I’am a man

my first ever story line made! hope you guys can read it it’s quite long but i tell you it’ll be worth it!

enjoy! 🙂

CHAPTER I

“TAMI”

It was a gloomy Sunday and a peculiar tune from the piano was heard, an old man with his grandson were bound to set the mood of classic music as the grandfather is about to press the first key from the piano. Suddenly the grandson asked his grandpa,

“can we not play the piano for today but instead, can you please tell me a story?”.

The grandfather looked into his grandson’s eyes with some doubts and said, “Are you sure want to hear a story? A story that is no ordinary but surely, you’ll learn..”

then the grandsons eyes beamed with excitement and said “that will be cool, grandpa, am ready to listen.” Then the two sat on a wooden chair with bushes and roses around, and grandpa started.

Tami grew up from a well-known family; he seemed to have everything in this world. He lives with his parents and sister in a grandiose mansion near the city. Tami being the eldest of Rudy and Elise there has been too much expectation on him, yes him! Tami is a boy! But he prefers to be called as Tami than his real name Artemio. Tami is an intelligent boy, a loving son and a supportive brother, yet as he grew, he seemed to be uneasy, uncomfortable with what he feels. There were times that he’d rather play alone than go out on a football match, he’d rather have music than go street dance, he seemed to be different from all the boys of his age.

Tami broke down on one corner the other day, he seemed to be anxious and agitated until he saw his sisters’ doll on a wooden chair and stared. From that day on, Tami is fond of seeing the doll from that chair. He seemed to be relaxed whenever he sees the doll. Tami became a teenager and expectations from his dad grew much fonder. Tami wasn’t able to abide for whatever it is that his dad wants him to be like; be on a varsity team, play drums, go round with some famous girls and so on. Until that one day, that Tami’s dad caught him dancing and singing in front of a mirror with some rollers and curlers on his hair, dressed like a doll, acting like a lady. His dad was so upset and even had a hearty attack. After that incident, Tami decided to leave their house and his wealthy life. He went to an urban city where his childhood friend lives.

Chang in short for Chastity is Tami’s childhood playmate when they’re 6 years old, they seemed to bond so much when they’re young. Chang is no typical girl he seemed to be boyish and aloof but whenever he’s with Tami, chang is alive and happier. Chang’s family knew what happened to Tami’s dad, and with the good relationship that they had, they allowed Tami to stay with them for a while.

“Grandpa what happened to Tami’s dad when they knew that he left?” grandpa said..

In the mansion, all are in panic for they knew about Tami’s escape. They were all worried including he’s dad who’s bed ridden for quite some time due to the heart attack. Yet his dad said in a sluggish tone

“let him live his life from now on, Tami is all alone..” and sobbed.

Later that day, chang found Tami at the edge of a river side and said “hey tami don’t you dare jump into the river, life is not as cruel as it is there are reasons for you to go on, never blame yourself for everything that’s been happening..” and Tami replied in a loud voice!

“Who told you that am ought to jump in this rusty river! Am just here to think, to have my realizations..” then chang smiled and said “you’re crazy! Come on let’s talk about it”

“I was never a perfect son, am such a disgrace to our name and family, because of me my dad almost died, am hopeless chang really hopeless.” Chang smiled and said “you’re wonderful Tami! From the day we were kids I knew you’re different, you’re not a typical boy, but surely, you’re one of a kind.” Tami replied with giggles. “ I can’t believe you just said that, thanks chang chang!” and they all laughed.

CHAPTER II

“Chang”

As Tami’s family were busy with their business, with their dad’s fast recovery. They seemed to forget about Tami. Tami on the other hand is living a simple life at the urban city with chang’s family. It has never been too easy for Tami for he grew up in a comfortable life. Chang has been there to support Tami all the way. Early routines includes waking up at 5am, fetching some pails of water, going into the woods, raising some cattle, feeding some hens and pigs, things that were really far from Tami’s city life. Yet Tami had a happy disposition with the care and support that he’s been receiving from chang’s family, everything seemed to be worth living

And it was dinner; Tami was sitting in a wooden chair with a small table and dim light with ka nonong and ka iska (chang’s parents) and chang of course. Tami showed he’s appreciation and gratefulness towards everything that the family has done for him. Mang nonong said

“you’re welcome Tami we just hope that you could find yourself while you’re here with us, you’re father has been so good to me and my family that’s why we’ll do everything to repay him in the simplest way we can even making his first born feel comfortable and at most settle you’re queries with your dearest dad.”

Tami replied with a smile. Dinner has needed, after helping with the chores; Tami stood near the door and is looking at the moon. Chang came and said

“what’s with the moon Tami?”

Tami replied nothing! And mumbled How I wish I could be the moon, that shines and lights even the darkest part of the night..” then chang giggled “ you’re some kind of a poet lately huh?.. Kidding aside it’s almost late! We’re ought to do tons of chores tomorrow for a living alright?!” Tami replied! “AJA! Good night my chang chang!” chang smiled and blushed! “Good night Artemio!”

CHAPTER III

“THE BOYISH IS IN LOVE”

“Grandpa I think that chang would fall in love with Tami? Doesn’t she?. Grandpa replied “let’s see”

8 months has passed and Tami got used to the urban life yet for him something is missing, he feels incomplete, but at most he’d rather ease loneliness and makes himself busy. In the house, chang and Tami were talking about life, love and boys. All of a sudden chang screamed and said “please Tami stop talking about boys! They don’t interest me” Tami looked into chang’s eyes and said

“even a pretty boy like me wouldn’t interest you?” then chang slapped Tami and said “men you’re a bisexual, you even don’t know what’s your preference. Haha just kidding, you’re wonderful my pretty boy”. Yet deep inside chang has a quirky, weird feeling, despite her boyish, strong image, she opted to have some hidden feelings for Tami that she’s ought to deny onto herself every now and then.

“I told you grandpa! Chang will fall in love!” grandpa giggled! And said she does, she really was in love.

One rainy night Tami arrived home with a paper on his hand. “Chang chang I was hired at the city. The urban market officer referred me to the municipality and gave me a permit to work at the city isn’t that great?” chang replied “how dare you’d just leave me? Us? Here! After everything, how selfish”.  then chang ran out of the house. while,

Mang nonong said to tami “oh that’s a good news Tami work hard! Prove your dad wrong!” then Tami went out to see chang. Chang was sitting at the edge of the river and said” I won’t jump! I just want to be alone” Tami answered “but why? Of all people I wasn’t expecting you to be like that, aren’t you happy for me? Aren’t you my best friend?” When chang heard that she run again and went to their house. Tami thought of leaving chang alone and have some time to think.

At chang’s room, mang nonog hugged her dearest chang and said” you’re in love aren’t you?” chang replied “who? Me? With whom Tami? Damn that’s crazy it gives me chills dad!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                You’re unpredictable!” mang nonog replied “don’t deny it my dear, it shows! From that day when Tami came into our house he’s been the greatest part of you, from the day you guys were kids he’s been there always for you. It is never impossible to love someone like him despite his gender preference and confusions what matters, is that what you feel is real and that is the greatest deal. Chang grabbed his dad and cried out loud.

The next morning chang asked Tami to go out, they went off the woods and talked, in there chang told Tami that “hey pretty boy am sorry for last night, it was my fault I should be happy for you, and perhaps let you go and spread your wings, who am I to imprison you in this urban world you’re not rally into, go on and have a great life!” Tami replied “oh my chang chang thank you! You’re the most wonderful person I’ve ever known and I’ll ever have, I’ll be forever you’re best friend no matter what.” And they hugged, and wiped their tears and giggled.

Approaching home mang nong was waving a piece of paper! Chang run to his dad and said.” What is it dad?” mang nonong ”A scholarship chang you can study in the city! You’re dream! You can be with tami too isn’t that great?” chang was sobbing “I can’t leave you and nanay iska here, I can’t I can’t” mang nonog replied “it’s time for you to follow your dreams and your heart go on my child! Break free”

Even if it’s so hard for chang to leave her parents its like god made his way to fulfill her dreams and be with the one he truly love. Sacrifices, for some dreams. That’s just a little.

CHAPTER IV

“THE CITY”

Mang nonong and nanay iska hugged their dearest chang chang and bid their goodbye, also with Tami. “Take care you both! Be good.” Tami and chang waved goodbye with hopes of prosperity, safety, love and peace for both mang nonong and nanay iska.

City life begun, unusual for chang but the usual for Tami. Adjustments were made, and they both ought to be settled in their own paths and career.

“Tami the city is wonderful yet you should be cautious always for you not to make mistakes”

Tami replied “yes my chang chang it is indeed beautiful to be in here, free and wandering, fast and furious.

After some months, Tami had a relationship with a guy. named, Bran. When chang knew about it. It just made her depressed and sad, until that one day chang changed her image into a more city girl, more, sexy and beautiful, lavishing the boyish look from the urban empowered with the true love for Tami. Yet Tami was surprised with chang’s transformation

“What is this chang? Why did you change? What for? For whom? I’d rather be forever with the old chang the simple, the strong, the boyish, the honest, the truthful you”

Chang replied

“Who? The simple boyish ignored! The honest sincere, I’am just a friend, and will always be! I know that! Am changing, but one thing has remained Tami! The real deal! The truth that I’d rather jump into that rusty river than to live my life without you and let you be fooled and played by some strangers

“But why?”

“I don’t know! No?

Then chang run as fast and reached the football stadia and Tami ran after him. The rain poured and the two are staring at each others eyes, soaking in cold rain, Tami hugged chang and kissed her into the cheeks, they gazed into each others eyes and kissed the night away. At the apartment there was love. That was the first night for the two of them. The night filled with love and passion and deepest emotion. The moon shined in through the dark night and lighted the bloom city. It was a masterpiece, of classic, of love, of a tine to be hummed, and thy…

The sun has risen as the two woke in each others arms.

“I’am sorry tami this happened”

“ssshhhh.. nothing to be sorry for, love was we were for, ain’t no mistake to dwell for”

The relationship of the two became fonder.  They were much closer than ever. Tami broke up with Bran and realized his worth after what happened the other night. Tami is thrilled by the fact that, “yes I’am in love with a girl but my heart is still a girl?”

CHAPTER V

“THE DILEMMA”

“I shouldn’t told you the love story” grandpa said

“No grandpa, I ought to understand I’m a grown up now I’m 12 now remember”

“What happened next grandpa?”

He was Confused but thriving that’s what Tami is into at the moment; until a bad news rocked their lives. Mang nonng and nanay iska died of an accident the other day. When they knew about it chang and Tami went back to the urban. Chang was really upset! She can’t accept the fact that she loss her parents in just a glimpse. Everything that she’s been working for were turned to nothing because of her parents death.

“How am I supposed to live now I’ve lost my mom and dad? Tell me now how to live! I’m all alone, alone!”

They were all in grief and depressed. It was a really 360 degree turn that has happened. Tami’s family knew what happened and they were there to reach out but Tami refused to

“Thank you but I don’t need your help mang nonong and nanay iska has been so good to me, your help they’re just money, but what they gave me is acceptance, respect and a true family.”

Tami’s mom and sister went away with tears in their eyes, also with Tami he’s sobbing after seeing his mom and sister

“I miss them a lot, but I have no choice but to prove myself, that I am worthy of their name, that I’m capable of their expectations. If not, then let me be just a stranger to them, for now” and tears fell down.

It’s the interment day and fresh flowers from the bushes were scattered, black color reigned, and the lovely couple are now ought to rest in thy peace. Tami and chang remained strong throughout for they knew they have each other.

“chang chang I’m here, hold my hand, take me everywhere, I’ll wipe your tears, cast your negativity, I promise not to go away and find the finest way for you to be happy.

Chang stared at Tami and said “thank you, now , you’re all I’ve got!”

Fresh petals flew in the air with the symphony of grief and sadness the wind blew in a direction of in-depth emotion.

Tami placed a red rose on his Left ear and also at chang’s ear. The red rose symbolizes the love, support that Tami has for chang either as a fiend or a lover

CHAPTER VI

“THE GRIEF”

On their way home in a windy afternoon, chang fainted, was pulse less and so weak that lead Tami to make a decision to bring her urgently to the city hospital. In the hospital they found out that chang is two weeks pregnant. Tami didn’t know what to feel. He’s excited yet filled with worries for chang. chang has been through a lot. Tami believed thou that the child was a blessing

“I’ll become a father? A dad, how can I? When I myself is confused, when I’m broke, when am no where yet for whatever it is I promise to become a better dad, a better man, a better me, for chang and our child.”

While chang is in her recovery

“Tami what happened? Is everything fine?”

“My gorgeous babe from the universe! Oohh lala you’re ought to become mother’s natures best! You’re pregnant!.. We’re ought to have a baby!”

“You must be freaking crazy? Are you kidding me?”

“No chang! We’ll have our first-born and I can’t wait for that! Let’s stay positive my dear! Everything will work out fine! I’ll triple or even quadruple my job to give you a better life

“But what about your family?”

“My family? They don’t know me! Who am I to ask for their help, I don’t need them, for they never needed me, and they’re just ashamed of me, a gay having a child that’ll be insane for them, they won’t believe me”

“Keep calmed pretty boy”

“You too mothers best”

The 2 we’re so excited to have a child. Tami is working thrice the effort for a living, he’s been into construction, grocery man, driver and at night he used to be an extra at a music bar. Nothing is seemed to be impossible for he is determined to achieve what he wants. He forgot his bisexual life, he reframe from hanging out with city guys and kept himself reserved and preserved. He’s been into questions like

“Maybe now I am a really man?”

CHAPTER VII

“THE GIFT”

Though tami has been through much efforts, life is really not that easy. His cousin from the high society was unluckily the engineer assigned on the construction site he’s working for months.

“Look who’s showered with gravel and sand! And carrying the block Artemio, my dearest cousin, a rich kid, now a poor guy, a boy, now a gay? Is it not ironic my dear cousin?” then Tami replied

“At least I’ve learned how to sweat for a living unlike you always seeking for what you’re parents will say, or will ask you to do. I’ve live alone without harming anyone, and if you have issues of who I am better yet not point your fingers and just ask yourself am I a real man?”

Then Tami’s cousin went away. At home chang is still in bed, her pregnancy has been into complication and the doctor has said that chang’s pregnancy will not be easy for her, she might be at risk, better yet precautions and safety always must be observed. Chang and Tami lived a simple life at the city. It can’t be denied that tami has been doing all the work, the hard labors to earn money.

“tami just tell me if you’re tired”

“I’ll never get tired, of being me, of being the man you need, even if still confused am ought to give you the best, never mind my sweats, for am ought to give you a life with no regrets.”

“Men that’s so sweet!”

The 2 had a great night and then…

“And then what grandpa?”

“And then”

“Will chang have a baby boy or girl? I wonder what?..

“You’ll see…”

CHAPTER VIII

“THE BOY”

It was a rainy night when Tami is on his way home. On the door, he heard a loud scream.

“Tami! Help! Help!”

Tami rushed into chang’s room

“What happened?”

“I think I’ll give birth today”

Then Tami rushed chang at the hospital

At the hospital, the doctor noted that it is crucial but chang should undergo a premature delivery, in the cesarean section. Yet the doctor warned Tami the consequence of what’s ought to be sacrificed since chang’s body is so weak that she might not be able to cope up with the operation. Tami went to chang in the operating room and said

“I can’t loose either you or the child”

“choose the child, Tami, for him to see the world and know how wonderful you are, of how great man you are, tell our child that I’m ought to be the most beautiful mom in the world and I love him so much that I’d rather die to keep him alive

“No chang no”

“Tami please do this for me, I’ve been in the happiest and strongest days of my life when I had you by my side, surely my mom and dad will be happy we will gaze into the heavens and will watch you from there.”

“Don’t say that chang”

“I did, I mean it Tami. Love again, live you life and take good care of our child, please tell the doctor am ready.”

“No”

“Please yes, I love you Artemio the guy and the gay in you thought me of what love is and eventually showed the reality of true love, you’re my man! A wonderful man”

Tami was left with no choice he run through the doctor with confusion and said

“Do what ever it is that will save the two of them”

The doctor said “we’ll try”

Tami went to the hospital’s chapel and knelt down and prayed

“please save my girl and my child, who am I to beg you, am just a sinner, but please oh lord I ask for your forgiveness give chang and our child the strength to hold on and give me thy wisdom to carry on. I humbly ask for your grace oh lord.”

Weeping in tears tami arrived at the operating room with the doctor in a poker face.

“what happened? Is she alright?”

The doctor nodded and said we did our best son, but your baby boy is still thriving and surviving, we’re sorry”

From the moment Tami knew that chang was gone. He was shocked left with no choice but to sit on a wooden stool, weeping, in tears and in sorrow. Flashback of their wonderful moments came in, and he’d remember chang to be as strong so he’d rather be strong for himself and for their baby boy.

CHAPTER IX

“THE LIFE”

“That was so sad grandpa, “

“Yes it is but Tami has a life to fulfill he has a child now”

“then what’s next??”

The hospital smelled like a fresh red rose from the bush, lights were bright, and everything is white. Tami approached chang’s cold body and said

“Thank you! But at the same time you didn’t deserve this but as you were, you’re strong. I promise to raise our child, like those days were kids, smart, happy, free-spirited and lively. I won’t last a day by telling him stories about you and your family. You’ve complete me chang. You’ve made me real and strong. So long my gorgeous boyish babe. I’ll surely miss you.”

Chang’s bodies were cremated and Tami decided to scatter its ashes at the river near chang’s old house at the urban where tons of memories lives within. It has been a difficult day for Tami, yet he remained strong seeing his baby boy in a crib, and gasping for air made him realize he wanted to live more, fonder and fighting.

He held the baby boy in his arms and said,

“Hey buddy am you’re dad! I may be different but am not bad! Your mom told me that you’re the finest blessing we had and we love you so much, you gave me another life and thank you for that.”

From that day on, it was not easy for Tami to raise his child alone he had some help from his city friends and they were able to raise “driven” very well. Driven (Tami’s son) grew in a very competitive environment, he knew their story, of course he knew Tami’s uncertainties and was never ashamed of it. Driven was a determined type, a brave soul, courageous, adventurous and responsible most of all respectful and admirable.

“ama thank you for everything”

“You’re welcome my driven”

Tami isn’t called dad! But he was called ‘ama’ by his son. They lived a simple life in the city. Driven is very intelligent, he’s got tami’s pretty boy looks, he’s into football and a band player. At times tami thinks that

“The things that I wasn’t before when I was young, Driven became all that today. Without me insisting them to happen.”

Tami was able to work for a congressman in the city he knew how delicate it would be but he took risk, for great salary of course. Time has gone by so fast and Driven is celebrating his 18th and is ought to finish high school. Everything seemed to be perfectly fine. Until one day….

CHAPTER X 

“CHANCE”

“One day?? Grandpa spill it”

One day it was Driven’s big day and Tami wasn’t yet home, everyone was worried. Driven remembered

“ama told me that congressman has a campaign speech near the urbane, maybe that’s why he won’t make it today

Tami’s friend told Driven

“Don’t be upset my dear; your ama wouldn’t forget your graduation day.

Until a television news flash came out

Breaking news had Tami on the cover catching a bullet for the congressman on a mass speech at the urbane. The incident had led to an in-depth drama Tami was comatose for quite some time attained a gunshot wound that approached his spinal cord causing and injury at the 11th thoracic vertebra. So drastic it may seemed, as Driven is marching towards high school graduation his ama is at the edge of death.

Knowing what happened Driven came into the hospital immediately after the graduation ceremony. With his toga on, he saw his ama at the ICU with ventilators, oxygen tanks and everything on his ama’s body. Driven screamed out and cried and found injustice of what happened. Anger wrapped his little heart and decided to become a lawyer to fight for small people’s rights. at the moment all he knew was justice

On the same day, Tami’s mom and sister arrived at the hospital there they met Driven for the very first time. Tears flooded and exquisite guilt and remorse surrounded thy place. Driven hugged his grandma and aunt tightly and asked for forgiveness and help

“I know what happened please help my ama he loves you so much that he has been fighting and thriving to prove himself more, that he deserves your family. I’m Driven Artemio’s son”

Tami’s mom knelt down with grief and said

“Oh my poor child what had we done”

Driven hugged his grandma and said

“We’ll be strong for ama right?”

And they were all calmed and in ease

The doctor spoke to Elise (Tami’s mom) and said he’ll be fine for the few days, but we can’t promise a better prognosis he may be struggling after his recovery, nothings going to be easy so please be strong for him.

Prayers flooded and Tami’s mom and sister stood by driven through it all

One day Tami was conscious after a long coma

“Driven son where are you?”

Elise came to Tami and said

“Son am here, am sorry for everything” (weeping in tears)

“Don’t be mom, I should apologize”

“sshhh just rest first my dearest Tami, everything will be fine” after a few hours

Realizing the long coma and the paralysis that may occur on Tami’s lower extremities

“Doc why can’t I move my feet, doc?! Help me!”

It was confirmed that Tami can no longer ambulate in a normal way; he needs physical therapy throughout his life to supervise his prognosis, regain his function and prevent more complication. Driven knowing all this remained still and said

“ama you’ll get through this, you will, we’re strong chang chang told us to be one, I’ll help you seek justice and we’ll walk through a path of light, positivity and forgiveness with love at most, ama, we can.”

Out in the hospital Tami’s mom and sister brought Driven and Tami in their city mansion

Tami said “what about dad?”

“He’ll be fine son, he will be”

Arriving at the mansion; Tami was quite excited, home sweet home indeed, forgiveness cured his insanity and as they approached the door. Tami’s dad welcomed them and said

“Welcome home my son, Tami”

With tears Tami replied

“I’m sorry dad its no longer Tami it’s Art, Artemio”

Then all sobbed in tears and hugged each other

Soon after the longest drama, everyone lived a normal life in the mansion. Tami is still on going with his therapy and was able to be into music, he was a pianist at five-star hotels with his wheelchairs on of course. Driven went to law school and eventually had his own family. He became a successful lawyer and is famous in his craft. As to the whole family they lived happily, in peace, in forgiveness, giving chance and with love.

“oh my grandpa you we’re Tami?”

“Yes I was my dear, and the brave young man Driven was your dad.”

“Oh I can’t believe it, it’s been a ride”

“yes it was, m y grandson, it takes a man to face his battles but it takes a real man to go on through the journey, either win or lose, either wounded or bruised, at the end of the day the measure of the greatness of one man is not measured by its gender, is not measured by its worth, its popularity, but of how you’ve been there and get through it. People may say too much about you, may judge you, but deep inside you, you know who you are and what you’re capable of just stop pleasing everyone, shine in your own right and be the best, just like the doll in a chair with nothing to prove or the rusty river who’s been flowing till it doomed or a red rose that can grace a sad day or a moon the lights even the darkest nights, a man is ought to be in its best form molded by experience, shaped by love and built by truth passion and sincerity, surely you’ll become a better one. love yourself my dear, love the people around and be a man of you own right cause all of us can say “I’am a Man”.

And grandpa played his favorite piano piece. All at ease and in peace….

The Lyricist

 

on a crumpled sheet of paper

with a dark pen and some letter

a hymn of melody came out

and the lyricist broke down

sealed with tears and piety

geared with passion and emotion

longing and yearning were plotted in a form

the notes were so high

and some were too low

flats and sharps aren’t avoided

surely can’t get rid of any mistake

the beat and its tempo

its pitch and its rhyme

collaborated with the feeling

of empathy and sincerity

plotted in a sheet

with a G clef and do re mi

the music flew out naturally

with the lyricist in uncertainty

made thy song with originality