Allowed

if I’d allow myself to be drowned again

I’d dive into this deep emotion I’m feeling

that all this time I’m still longing

and that it’s you that I’ve been constantly missing 

if I’d allow myself to be ignorant again

I’d pretend that I never felt that pain

surreal that it almost tangled my vein

and that losing you is what I would gain

unknowingly I stumbled hard and went out of the rain 

some things that I can’t contain

true feelings that remains

lavished by the blue waters

poured by the hard rain

blown by the strong wind and hurricane

please allow me to stay

as in love as this way

saved by this love I feel everyday

that it’s still you that takes my heart away 

 

Advertisements

Surreal

just when I thought that it wasn’t real

it suddenly hit me and wounds aren’t bearable to conceal  

with this holes and spaces in between

patiently waiting to be filled

with truthfulness and sincerity to dig in 

 

I wish that I wasn’t able to feel

this kind of pain that is surreal

that paralyzes my mind and heart

more than just being ill

picking up the pieces, embroidering its parts

forming this broken piece of art 

 

tell me it’s not a big deal

that it’s just another ordeal

enabling me to feel

how love can grow and how it can easily be killed 

detailed by pieces and cuts

makes you wounded and scarred

for at last

the art of loving someone is conceived by a pain that is surreal 

She was….

she was torn between the pureness of friendship and love

she was blown away

she was conquered by the play

she might have wanted to just run away

but she was

she was knocked by the verge of falling

she was getting there

she was composing herself to admit thy feeling

thy feeling

of uncertainty and realization that she knew

she knew it wouldn’t be for long

she was there, been there and seemed to falter

with nothing to hold on but such intuition

and or not affection nor attraction

she just can’t deny the joys

she can’t hide those smiles and that yes indeed

she’s starting to like him 

Need i Say More

the thought that i’m on the verge of liking you is like the most enormous feeling of losing and winning both at the same time

realizing it is not meant, it is just as plain, it could have been the greatest feeling in the world

sounds crazy but real

a girl can melt by such endearing treatment

a girl can fall through a sensible conversation

a girl can be attached to someone who seemed to be so joyful and positive

courageous and honest

but for what is meant to happen will happen

but for now

just this thought

this idea

this sound that my intuition and emotion that keeps on ringing

inside my head, near my heart and inside my soul

i bet you would just stumble

and realize that i fell from the trap

but need i say more

i was just weak enough

weakened by your good did, laughter and stories

and just by simply being you 

need i say more

I’m on the verge of liking you and it’s like losing and winning both at the same time 

When It’s a Game Fit for Two

when it’s a game fit for two

with no rules and don’t know what to do

resist it, don’t play the game

but if you’re brave enough and tamed 

take the risk and stick on with the game

when it’s a game fit for two

with no standards or norms to follow

be thrilled, go on and play

but don’t wish something would’ve stayed

even a snap or a glimpse of attachment that could stain

could stain an unblemished heart with uncertainty

just hid all the reasons

throughout the season

with freewill and ain’t no anticipation

assumptions or expectations

go on with the game

but if the consequence is as uncertain

be willed and face it

strong enough and admit it

for you don’t know

it might have been playing this game

that i may win or lose

courageous and bruised

truthful or used

and that it is between me and you

and this game fit for two

that lead thy emotions to ponder

and even wonder…

maybe it’s like I’m starting to like you 

Stranger

who’d rather fall for a stranger

gaze into his eyes

filled with empathy and surprise

walk through the night

igniting those lights

getting rid of that fright

who’d rather fall for a stranger

knowing just a bit about him

and just saw him in a pilgrim

oh and just tell me, it was just a dream

who’d rather fall for a stranger

when everything is uncertain

when nothing is proven

and ain’t no real love driven

why fall for a stranger, when you knew…

a stranger can deceive thee

but rather would you say

he got me

Naive

Call me crazy or naïve

But I’d rather live in grief than risk

To love again is to live again

And am ought to just falter and not bother

For I have learned to love once, only once

And for thee

It is the last

Call me crazy or naïve

Yet it is the truthfulness and vagueness of emotions that I feel

I have loved once

Was hurt, was happy, was torn

Yet am all up to is the reality of having that love for a long time

Within me, inside me even if nobody knows it but me

Call me crazy or naïve

But it’s the real deal

It’s everything that I feel

Even if it has made me ill

He will always be the man who am ought to love

With all thy will

And forever I will 

Still

embracing the past, giving it a blast

even if it cuts

at times it is still worth the chance

making your heart beat fast

believing it will last

“I love you still”

forgive thee as I forgive you, 

but if to forget you is what am ought to do

I’m ready

to commit to the fact that having you, loving you and hating you at the same time

is my strength and weakness to get through

to pull through

to be

to live, love and forgive…..

maybe tomorrow or just never

but you’ll have this place in my heart forever

Pseudo

for some it starts with a physical attraction

that may lead to an in-depth admiration

and can cause too much infatuation

with thy stirring feeling of confusions

but can you trust thy intuition

if there ain’t no compassion

and or affirmation

just being satisfied at a brisk of false intention

that all  are just illusions

and what you create are just delusions

of a perfect meaningful imagination

that has caused thy feeling of too much ignition

there ain’t no passion yet only pure emotion

with no direction and solution

if it has caused too much

can you forgive yourself for too much obsession

or just simply crack and grind thy all creation

or pity thy self for drowning into much collision

yet maybe you just need some reflection

tons of severe realization

that love is not about attraction or even admiration

but it’s about the cohesion, of two mutual emotion

bound by strong commitment and purest intention

with responsible words and actions

that separates the truth from what is pseudo

that classifies the right from wrong

that love is

a reality ain’t no fantasy

just avoid being dreamy

to get rid of being weary

and just prepare to be happy

for a true and endless love story

 

Who’s Who?

you’d rather love who?

the one who’s been there through your highs and lows

your companion, your trustee, your friend

the one who’s been thriving to defend

the one who’s been listening and ready to comprehend

years were counted and still remained good friends…

or would you rather fall to a man

who’s been the knight in your dreams

the man who set the highest ideals

the man who’s on top

the man of soul and passion

the man who’s brought too much infatuation

and in-depth attraction.. yet eventually

the man you can’t have but you terribly want

or should it be a mystery guy

who came into your way and said hi!

made you fall into his smile

without realizing his heart is already tied

made some promises and even lied

a mystery guy who ones made you cried

over uncertainties and made all things subside

didn’t know but why…

or would it be best

to go for someone whom you’re destined to be with

agreed by the people around

particularly the ones who made and initiated thy sound

a good guy, a church man, a pianist

a  guy next door

but ain’t no spark at all

no connection, nor attachment just deals..

ain’t nothing for real

who would you choose??

would you rather fall

or just stand tall

and say

maybe love isn’t yet thy call…